Frankly, I've never understood the naked hatred that exists for the character type known as a "Mary Sue" (if you don't know what a Mary Sue is, try Pat Pflieger's essay, Too Good To Be True: 150 Years of Mary Sue, an excellent look at the subject that treats it far more seriously than I do). Sure, such characters are often annoying, and the stories that they're part of are often bad, but there's an incredibly easy way to deal with such stories: don't read them. In all honesty, I did not create Sapphirebreeze in response to Mary Sues themselves as much as I created her in response to people's reactions to Mary Sues. Yes, I use SapphireBreeze to make fun of Mary Sues. However, I am also making fun of myself. Contrary to first general impressions, her name is not derived from that of a certain other prominent gemstone-named Transformers fan character. When I was younger, many of my original characters had gem-based names, and thus, my intentional Sue has a gem-based name. I am also making fun of people who spend significant time or energy hating Mary Sues. I'm doing this two ways. First, by creating Sapphirebreeze, I'm saying, "Ha! I'm creating a Mary Sue and you can't stop me! Neener neener!" Second, I'm creating a blatant Mary Sue type that many Sue haters actually like. Ha! Take that! Really, the whole thing is rather silly, and thus, so is SapphireBreeze. And yes, I am well aware of the fact that I'm capitalizing the "b" in her name about fifty percent of the time. I'm doing that just to annoy you.

For Sapph's bio to make much sense you need to know what a SNAD is. SNAD stands for Sensitive, New-Aged Decepticon, and generally refers to Decepticons in Mary Sue fics that behave far nicer than they really ought to. Check out Thundercracker's Pile of Garbage for more information, several really bad fics, and a collection of Sue-parodies that follow the traditional Sue model a bit closer than Breezy does.

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Name: Sapphirebreeze (or, when I'm feeling particularly malicious, SapphireBreeze)

Faction: Sueforce

Function: Interdimensional Law Enforcement

Alt Mode: F-18 Hornet

Motto: "Now, now! You've been a naughty, naughty Sue!"

Background: Sapphirebreeze is a native of the Suniverse, an alternate dimension that is the true origin of all Mary Sues. The Suniverse is a beautiful place, with unicorns and faeries and what-have-you and the occasional evil being trying to take over or destroy everything so that one of the Sues can have a chance to save the day. The Suniverse is also subjected to a roving interdimensional vortex called the "Plot Device" that snatches up Sues at random, rearranges their memories, and plops them into other realties (altering the memories of those in the new realities as well). This is how most Sues come into the fanfiction realities as we know them, but not Saph. Saph was failing Suniversity (try as she might, she just couldn't get the knack of healing people), and was offered a deal by the Council of Sue: if she would work for them as an enforcer for Sueforce, she would be granted a diploma from the Suniversity.

Now, Sapphire's mission in Sueforce is fairly simple: travel from reality to reality and gather up all the wayward Sues on behalf of the Council of Sue. The Council of Sue consists of several very wise, powerful, and, of course, beautiful individuals who realize that the minds of lesser beings should be allowed to develop freely, and thus must not be subjected to the personality altering effects of a Suniverse-native's aura, called a Snadification field. A Sue who's had her memory altered generally has no idea that she emits this field, and honestly believes that she is reforming the object of her affections through the power of her love.

For the purpose of her travels, Sapphire's own Snadification field has been dampened, and she's been equipped with a de-Snadding ray and a memory restoration ray, plus a small assortment of more standard weaponry. Sapphire's run into several problems on her missions due to the fact that she herself is, at heart, a Sue and is forced to act against her nature. The greatest difficulty she's encountered is the fact that she's desperately in love with Starscream (any of them, from any reality), but, not only does she not have a Snadification field with which to win his heart (or fuel pump, or whatever), but she is forced, upon the completion of each mission, to nobly leave her love behind in the name of duty, after which she moves on to another reality (with a quick drop-off in the Suniverse), where she falls in love only to have her heart broken all over again.

Often, all it takes is a shot from her memory restoration ray and a harsh admonishment ("Naughty Sue! Playing with the minds of lesser beings!" "Opps! Sorry!") to get her job done, but some Sues are more stubborn. She has been authorized the use of lethal force if all other means fail, but Sues are very hard to kill, and on occasion she's had to resort to "Plan Z". "Plan Z" is where she pretends to be an evil supervillain bent on total destruction so that the Sue perp can sacrifice her life nobly in order to save all reality. She's only accidentally destroyed one universe this way, but all that pretending to be evil seems to be starting to affect her mind... Edit: The destroyed reality count is now up to two, for anyone keeping track.

In her spare time, Sapphire acts as the spokes model for a brand of laundry detergent that bares her name. Whether or not this detergent turns cloths gem-stone-blue has yet to be determined, as Saph herself does not wear cloths.

Appearance: Sapphirebreeze resembles a slender, more feminine, Seeker in robot form (although she has F-18 wings instead of F-15 wings), while her alt mode is that of an F-18 Hornet. Her color scheme is generally similar to the one used by the Blue Angels (minus the big words "U S Navy" printed on the wings), so mostly deep blue with yellow detailing. Her eyes are also yellow, although they'll change to red when she gets angry (or sometimes when she's playing Evil Mastermind). Her long, flowing hair (of course she has long, flowing hair) is a deep purple that sometimes reflects shades of green or blue, like a raven's wing. She normally keeps this hair tucked up beneath her helmet (which looks like the usual Seeker headpiece), because otherwise it gets caught in her joints when she transforms, and that really, really hurts. She does not have the shoulder/underwing guns of most Seekers, but instead pulls her pistols from subspace. Her voice makes her sound like she'd feel right at home in Castle Anthrax, of Monty Python's Search For The Holy Grail fame. She's having a Pretender shell constructed, but its appearance has not yet been revealed. Sources say that it does not look like a Care Bear, or a pastel pink-and-blue version of Slog.

Abilities: Many already listed. Her aim while firing is incredible, and she seems to shoot much farther than she really should be able to using pistol-type weapons. Her hand-to-hand is passable - based on skill alone, she can hold her own against most foes, although her fighting style tends to be more street-fighting/dirty than clean martial art (that's more her cop side rather than her Sue side showing). Her power (of course she has a power!) is telekinesis, but her range is limited to touch. "What's the point of that?" you ask. Basically, she uses it to make herself super strong and tough.

She has no healing abilities or skills whatsoever, and is a little sensitive about this.

Weaknesses: The afore mentioned lack of healing abilities, the fact that her Snadification field is dampened, the fact that she can easily be distracted by Starscream in a fight ("Starscream... *sigh*"), and then there's the way playing evil-universe-destroying-mastermind seems to be starting to taint her nature...

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I have absolutely no intention of ever writing a Sapphirebreeze story, but she seems to have made herself right at home in comics. All of the following pictures and comics are very, very sketchy. The only Photoshoping I did was to occasionally up contrast (so the pictures could be made out) and to add words.

• Introducing Sapphirebreeze: This was the original sketch done so I could get an idea of what she looks like with her hair down. It has been pointed out to me numerous times that she's not very curvy for a Transformer Sue, and has hardly any of what could be termed "breasts" at all. In response, I am going to follow in one of the grand traditions of Mary Sue writers everywhere and declare that everyone else is just jealous of my character because she's so kewl, and continue to draw her exactly like I want to. Besides, I personally think she looks damned cute as is.
• Sapphire In Helmet: Drawn so I could see what she looked like in a helmet, and because I felt like annoying her.
• "A Spanking! A Spanking!: Quick sketch of the rather strange image that popped into my head as a result of my referencing Monty Python for her voice.
• Three's A Crowd: First ever actual Sapphirebreeze comic.
• You Always Hurt The Ones You Love: Sapphire angsts over an injured Starscream.
• Opps, I Did It Again: Sapphirebreeze resorting to "Plan Z".
• Quintesue: Not technically a Sapphirebreeze comic or picture, but done in the same general mindset. This is idea for a Quintessonian Mary Sue or, as one person put it, "A Galactic Barbie gone horribly wrong." Most folks think I was pretty twisted for drawing it, but even I couldn't imagine someone twisted enough to write it.
• Everyone Knows It's Windy: Sapphire muses over the Sue that got away. Lyrics from "Windy" by The Association. I like that song, but it does make me think of Mary Sue...
• Laundry Day: Sapphirebreeze at her other job.
• A Visit With Dreadluna: Saph pays a visit to Wayward's headcharacter, Dreadluna. This one's kind of an inside joke for the Padded Cell..
• Why SapphireBreeze Has A Helmet: I know it's explained in her bio, but I felt a picture was in order.
• Sapphire's Pretender Shell: After "Opps, I Did It Again," I realized that SapphireBreeze would really find a pretender shell handy. For one, pretender shells make a character more powerful, which is always Sue-ish, and for another it makes for a handy built-in supervillain disguise. So I tried to come up with something that Sapphire would think is scary, plus I tried to work winged-cat into the theme, since winged-cat also gets you more Sue-points (why? Because there are a bunch of winged cat sues running about, is why). Of course, what Saph things is scary amounts to pretty silly looking to the rest of us, but hey.
• Sapphire's Pretender Shell In Color: As above, in Prismacolors. Yes, the shell is green with yellow polkadots. Because polkadots are scary.
• More Than Meets The Eye Profile: Commissioned from Wayward, because I'm a silly goose who pays other people good money to draw my Mary Sues. She makes Sapphire's shell look far more scary and less goofy than I do.
• Sapphirebreeze as Princess Leia: Sapphirebreeze in Leia's Jabba the Hutt costume, because. This was originally going to be part of a much more ambitious project, where a bunch of transformers were about as various Star Wars characters, but then I realized that I was far too lazy to ever finish it and if I wanted to ever move on to the other Sapphire comics/sketches I have planned, I'd better just post what I had. If anyone's curious about the list of 'actor's: Starscream was going to be Han Solo (and was the only other one I finished), a random Quint was going to be Jabba, the Quint Baliff dude was going to be Bib Fortuna, a random Sharkticon was going to be one of the piggy bodyguards, Wheelie was going to be Salacious Crumb (hee hee!), Deceptitran was going to be C-3PO, Shrapnal was going to be R2-D2 (or was it the other way around?), the coneheads were going to be the dancing girls, Soundwave and his cassettes were going to the band, Devcon was going to be Bobba Fett, Dweller In The Depths was going to be the Rancor, Skyfire was going to be Lando, Bonecrusher was going to be Chewie, and Ferak was going to be Luke. For most of these guys I had actual reasons for putting them in the slots I did, although some of the reasons ran toward the shakey side.
• A Small Suniverse: Not gonna say! Not gonna say! Except to note that she's supposed to be filing her nails there. We will ignore the fact that she has no nails.

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